November 17, 2012

Four Things That You Shouldn't Put In Your Vagina, But Probably Do

This one might surprise you!
1. Soap. Would you wash your eyes out with soap? No, of course not, because your eye cleans itself. It uses its own moisture to flush things out. You probably don't use soap when you clean your nose, either; it also uses its own moisture to clean itself. Well, this may come as a surprise to you -- but your vagina does that, too! A vagina is a self-cleaning organ. Healthy vaginas have their own slightly acidic pH balance, which maintains a certain level of good bacteria called "probiotics" (yeah, the word "bacteria" has an unpleasant connotation, but not all of it is bad!).  If the pH balance in your vagina is disrupted, it causes the wrong sorts of bacteria to thrive -- and then you can say hello to itchy, inflammatory, uncomfortable things such as yeast infections and urinary tract infections. Soap has a tendency to completely wreck the natural pH levels in a vagina, causing all the aforementioned unpleasantness. The ONLY thing you need to do in the shower to keep your fun bits happy and clean is to rinse them with water! Just water and a wash cloth!

Advertising will try to make you feel like your vagina is "gross" if you don't use one of these. Don't listen to them. 
2. Douches. I've always thought "douche bag" was an appropriate insult, because douches are unhealthy, irritating, and should not be let anywhere near a vagina (you know, just like some people). A "douche" is a small bottle or bag filled with a perfumed liquid that comes with a tube and that tube is used to squirt said liquid into the vagina. Like soap, douching can upset the delicate pH balance of a vagina, making you more susceptible to the aforementioned unpleasant infections. Since it squirts things into the vagina, it can also push bacteria upwards and introduce infections that way. Research has found that people who douche have a 73% higher risk of getting Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, which is an infection of the uterus, Fallopian tubes, and/or ovaries. Yikes! Advertising for douching products like to play into our insecurities about our vaginas, making us feel like we can only be "fresh" if we buy their stuff. They make us feel like our private bits will be "gross" if we don't give them our money. But let me put this as delicately as I can: it ain't supposed to smell like a flower. It is entirely normal for a vulva to have a bit of a musky scent. The scent of your vagina is actually a very valuable indicator of its health; if it's suddenly a lot stronger than usual, or otherwise different than it normally is, it can mean something is going on. This is another reason douching can be particularly dangerous: if you're pumping your private bits full of flowery perfumes and sweet scents, you're not going to notice when your natural scent changes!
Good to eat, but not good for your fun-bits.
3. Sugar. Okay, yes, you'd think this one would be obvious -- but whipped cream counts as sugar and you'd be amazed at how many people slather it all over their junk during sexual foreplay without a second thought. Yet again, this is a thing that can upset your vagina's pH balance and cause infections -- those things sure are picky, aren't they? If you want to incorporate sweet things into your sexy times without making your vagina angry, try spreading it on other parts of your body instead. Just keep it above your waist, eh?
Good for oral sex, bad for vaginal intercourse
4. Flavored Condoms. Flavored condoms are intended for use with oral sex to prevent sexually transmitted infections. And they serve their purpose pretty well on that front! However, they should not be used for PIV intercourse. The first reason is probably pretty obvious: like we've already discussed, vagina + sugar = bad. However, there are plenty of sugar substitutes out there, and the flavored condom you have may not even contain any actual sugar -- but that still doesn't mean you can use it for PIV sex. Anything scented can usually upset the pH balance of a vagina and cause infections -- douches, scented tampons, pads, etc -- and many flavored condoms are also scented to match whatever flavor they are. So, keep 'em out of that particular hole.


  1. I would suggest comparing the soap to the sugar. Meaning that if you can't put sugar on your vulva, you probably shouldn't put soap their either. A lot of women don't make the comparison and they think you need soap to clean your vagina/vulva.

    1. I'm sorry, I'm not sure what you're saying. Can you rephrase that?

  2. What about flavored lubes?

    1. Flavored anything is best reserved for oral sex!

    2. Oral sex happens in my vagina sometimes. So.

    3. Okay, let me clarify: flavored lubricant is great for use with oral sex that happens through a layer of latex, such as a dental dam or a condom. Flavored lubricant shouldn't be used for PIV intercourse.

    4. I've been told that flavored lubricant is okay as long as it's sugar free and it's only for oral

  3. There are certain soaps that can be used. They're for sexy shower time and can be found at many adult stores. :) It's best to check the label, or even (if you're comfortable) ask whoever is working there.

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